Archive for the 'Short Stories (Fiction)' Category
x. Confrontation
Jay D. had a girlfriend previously, but he was not one of those college students who kept changing their girlfriends periodically, nor was he one of those who were talented in ‘scoring’ girls. Consequently, he could not figure out how exactly he could approach Jessica, nor did he take any practical steps though he met her a few times after her birthday party. Much time passed, and when he realized, it was already April. He knew that Jessica was going to graduate in two months. She was likely to leave the town shortly afterwards. This was a college town and there was really no industry, nor were there a lot of businesses. Most of graduates left here to look for job opportunities consequently. Town would be without her and that realization made him feel despair; he had another year left in college, so that year would be the year of desolation. In the midst of this, he and his friends including Jakob decided to go see the screening of students’ films; this was an annual event. He had a low expectation actually, but he had to preoccupy his mind. Agonizing days continued, and when he realized, it was already the day of the screening.
The screening was held at the main university hall, and he and his friends took seats in the center. But shortly after he took the seat, his mind went completely blank. There she was; she sat several rows down from where he sat. She did not recognize him though partly because of the angle of the light. Perhaps he was in the state of panic rather than that he lost the capacity to think or feel. Thirty minutes or so after the screening started, she stood up and walked outside. In the dark, he could not see why she suddenly decided to do that, but it was probably because she wanted to take a phone call. Or conceivably, it was because she wanted to use a restroom as it was located outside the hall. He guessed he was not being very smart, but he also went outside shortly after she left in order to catch the sight of her. And there she was. He confronted her and told her how much he liked her. This confrontation was sudden; the confession was impetuous, impromptu and impulsive. He could not remember exactly what words he used, but he was certain that he clearly conveyed his feeling. Then, coolly, she responded; she told him she appreciated that he was being straightforward. She also told him she was flattered that he liked her. But that was basically the end of all. He could not recall what words she used exactly, but she clearly told him that she had no romantic interest in him. And then, they separated.
Short Stories (Fiction) | 23.11.2007 1:48 | No Comments
xi. Mother And Son’s Relationship After College Years
Shortly after he graduated from college, he left the country. He spent much of the next several years in Asia and eventually reached India. Evidently, the distance between him and his mother were growing. Also, as he became financial independent a few years after he moved to Asia, he no longer felt that he needed to be attached to his mother.
Supposedly, he wanted to clearly define the distance between him and his mother. Of course, it was not the only reason why he left US and reached Asia, the other side of the world, but posteriori told him that it was one of reasons. It was not that he disliked her, but it was that he almost felt it necessary to define a distance between them.
As he spent many years in Asia, he visited Japan on several occasions. When his mother grew up in 1950s and 60s, the country was already considerably developed, but, today, the country was completely avant-garde. He found that, in many regards, Japan was much more developed than US; similar comparison could be made between Tokyo and New York. But, he never stayed in the country for longer than two weeks on each visit. Every trip was enthralling, but after a period of time, he lost eagerness to engage in the people and the culture. This essentially reinforced the separation between him and his mother.
Short Stories (Fiction) | 23.11.2007 1:47 | No Comments
xii. Graduation Party
A week after the film screen, he sat in Java Jones’ patio; he was looking at the direction of the campus. He was half procrastinating, as usual, and half studying. Up until a month ago, there was only one defining moment he waited. Like an innocent teenager who suddenly discovered love and romance or the illusion of these ideas, he waited for the petite girl with blonde hair and green eyes. He virtually existed only for that moment. The rest did not matter much. It was sort of religious experience.
But this was no longer the case. When she showed up and invited him to her graduation party, he only had the sense of sorrow. Perhaps, it was friendly and courteous for him to show up and be a part of her last party in college, but he could not bring himself to it. The invitation card she made for the party was much more elaborate than the one she made for her birthday party, but he could only sigh when he looked at it.
Short Stories (Fiction) | 23.11.2007 1:47 | 1 Comment
xiii. Friendly Jessica
Girl riding bicycle approached him from the distance. He did not calculate its speed, its acceleration or deceleration, or its precise angle toward him, but he knew that she was approaching him. And shortly before he sensed this, he recognized that she was Jessica. Hippie-ish clothes and smile with a little sorrow. “Hey.” She parked her bicycle and approached him swiftly and eagerly. “You didn’t show up”, said she.
“I didn’t feel like showing up”, said he rather apologetically. This was probably the first time that she approached him rather ardently. He was a little thrilled on one hand, but, on the other hand, he felt a little quaint about it since she rejected him just a couple of weeks ago. She emphasized that she had a great party, but she spoke as if she forced him to believe that. He believed that it was indeed the case, but he found oddity in the way that she spoke.
Did she suddenly become his best friend? He wondered. She probably did not want to accept the idea that she was rejected. It was a funny thought of hers though; after all, she rejected him, and this was exactly why he stopped pursuing her.
After she told him about the party briefly, she told him about her plan after the graduation, which was only a few weeks ahead. She made an arrangement to study in Russia; she planned to focus on the language study in her first year there and try to get into a degree program later on. She also told him that she wanted to go visit its neighboring countries and get a good view of Eastern Europe. There she was; she was going away.
She said “I’ll see you around” as she left, but he never saw her after that. This was the last time he saw her.
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She did not leave US to get away from him, but the fact of the matter was that she would physically be far away from where he was. If they had been madly in love, then he might have reacted differently, but knowing that he would not be involved with her romantically ever, he would never ever pursue her, nor would he go to Russia just to follow her. He sorrowed that the separation of the two was so clearly denominated. But interestingly, that was what he was going do to his mother also. He was going to leave the country in a year or so, in part, in order to elucidate the estrangement.
Short Stories (Fiction) | 23.11.2007 1:46 | No Comments
xiv. Mother And Son’s Relationship, Confirmation Of Separation
A few years before he reached India, he started running his own business. Like many new businesses, he struggled initially. Commonly, many took a debt to start up in US, but he categorically rejected following this practice. He decided to spend a short period of time with his parents as he did the groundwork to start his business, though he dreaded it. Most businesses in US do not survive the first five years primarily because they cannot pay off their initial debts. Understanding that, he refused to follow the formula of failure. At the same time, he felt that this might be the last time he would spend a lot of time with his parents, though it was not the most ideal circumstance; he felt as if he had the obligation to share the time and the space one last time.
He ended up living with them for about a year; this was after he spent five years in Asia. He had the sense of gratitude for he was able to save a substantial amount of money. However, with regard to the relationship between him and his mother, he found that there was a chasm that could not be crossed. There were a number of ideological differences, but the most important of all such differences was that he had decided that he would become his own decision maker many years prior. Given the circumstance, he endured listening to her bemoaning and criticizing, but once he left his childhood home for the second time, there was no turning back.
This was one of reasons why he ended up taking a credit card loan; he did not bother listening to his mother’s complaining and scrutinizing. It was a possibility that she could have given intelligent suggestions, but he decided to take suggestions from others, not to reject her outright but to sustain the distance between them. This was not exactly a result of his dislike or hatred, but it was a result of his confirmation of the separation.
Short Stories (Fiction) | 23.11.2007 1:46 | No Comments
xv. What She Was
Jay D. was not the most social person, but his friend Jakob was; he apparently could not hold back finding out more about Jessica, so he asked around. He apparently spoke to quite a few people who knew her, and according to his research or gossips he heard from different people, she could have been a lesbian. After Jay D. heard this, the whole affair started making sense. Obviously was there no way of knowing if she started dating him or took him seriously, had she been heterosexual, but there was a certain awkwardness in her. As far as he knew, she had no boyfriend. This was her fourth year in college, so she had been in this town for almost four years. Yet, the whole time, she had no ex-boyfriends that her acquaintances knew of. This was unheard of in this town. Everyone dated someone or had dated in the past. There were loners, but being sociology major meant that the schoolwork was relatively light duty. Being reasonably pretty, sociable, not overly conservative or religious AND not having any boyfriends in the past or at the present did not make much sense.
He took a minute to look back on what happened. Posteriori told him that there were clear characteristics of lesbian in her. It is true that women in certain parts of the world have close physical contacts regardless of their sexual orientation; however, in US, it is highly unusual that two women kiss each other on lips; that was exactly what Jessica did. She was not anti-social but he got the impression that the relationship between her and her roommate was very inclusive. A characteristic of lesbian relationship. He also got the recollection that two had been known each other for a long time as friends or lovers. Lesbian couple tends to have a long relationship; this was another characteristic as well.
At this moment, this whole affair started turning into a bittersweet memory of the past. He still looked forward to read her thesis that she supposedly wrote using him as a subject; but the sense of desolation was rather strong. After all, she was not meant to be anyone whom he could possibly be involved romantically.
Short Stories (Fiction) | 23.11.2007 1:45 | 1 Comment
xvi. On Unrelationship
When he thought about relationships with women, the relationship between him and his mother and the relationship between him and Jessica (or unrelationship) were two of the most significant ones. But he had to recall another relationship. It should be called a romantic relationship in the sense that all physical aspects of the relationship were there including dating, sex, brief cohabitant and a certain exclusiveness. But, they were all mechanical. He was involved in the relationship not exactly wanting her; definitely not emotionally. He did not call it regrettable or a waste of time, but confirming that, he had to realize that, on the surface, that relationship was the most concrete one in his life that he ever had; that realization gave him the sense of desolation.
Short Stories (Fiction) | 23.11.2007 1:44 | No Comments
xvii. The Moment Of Truth
The day after he received the email from his mother, he reached the office at 11:00 pm as usual. His colleague was already there working. He was writing down addresses of his printing business clients on greeting cards. Cards were going to be sent as a formality of Diwali, the festival of the year in India. But, cards were sent to advertise their new web design business, and in fact, this was the main purpose. He hoped that this would facilitate him to rectify his troubling financial situation. This was not exactly his main business activity, but it was a very important side business that he was getting into; after analyzing the current situation, he found that this was the most intelligent and realistic way to reorganize his business.
He was very tired as a result of lack of sleep though. Fireworks and firecrackers were fired almost everywhere and they made huge sounds. He played with fireworks as he grew up and he had seen and heard fireworks and firecrackers, but it seemed that ones sold here were much more explosive and subsequently made much louder sounds. While he understood that there was a festive spirit behind, he felt very distressed as he heard these sounds. They were so loud that they almost sounded like small bombs. He could not rest well, and as a result, he had not been able to sleep well all week long, and consequently, he felt physically very tired. But despite that, he sat in front of his computer and started working.
Shortly afterwards, the colleague left to run errands. Soon after that, his brother, his daughter and his son showed up; they came to the office to hold a small ceremony related to Diwali. The daughter was 16 years old, but she looked much younger. The son was around 10 years old, but he might be much younger; the truth of the matter was that he did not know exactly how old he was.
As a responsible parent, his colleague’s brother decided to not subscribe an internet connection at home though he experienced inconveniences. He had a computer at home though. But as a result, 16 years old asked Jay to download songs from the internet. He knew how as he was quite knowledgeable when it came to the internet; he ran an online business after all. He did not feel comfortable downloading songs at the office mainly because it was strictly speaking illegal; however, since it was his colleague’s daughter’s request, he went ahead and downloaded songs as requested. Of course, all songs were Bollywood songs. The presence of Bollywood in India is absolutely phenomenal; basically, Bollywood is the entertainment.
Since her father’s computer had no internet connection, he was requested to make copies of all songs on her father’s pen drive so that she could carry them home and listen to them.
As he started downloading songs, it suddenly occurred to him that the essence of relationships between him and other women finally came down to this; the mechanical action of typing letters and clicking the mouse. After all these years, relationships between him and other women were mechanical and impersonal. They were neither sexual, sensual nor personal.
There were two types of parallel lines in his life. One type of lines represented relationships between him and those who wished to establish connections with him, and the other type of lines represented relationships between him and those who he longed to have connections with. There were no lines in the center; perhaps dots here and there, but they were not lines. There were also no converging lines. He felt like sighing; he did not do that in front of the 16 years old though, as it would have looked very strange to her and she might have felt that he was a bizarre person. But this was the moment of truth and enlightenment.
Songs were downloaded now and he copied them all into the pen drive. He made a few clicks to make sure that he could remove the drive safely. He took it out and passed it to her.
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Later, on the same day, he went to his colleague’s place to have dinner. But throughout the day, as he went over the current state of his social life, in particular, the romantic aspect of his social life, he started feeling nauseated. He was already quite stressed this week. Noise was something he could not handle well while fireworks and firecrackers were going on all week long. He had difficulty sleeping early in the week. That turned into stress. He was also tired as a result of lack of sleep. Tiredness and stress prevented him from working productively. So, now, he had three problems; stress, tiredness and lack of productivity. Then, he had this nausea of realizing how pathetic his romantic life had been.
He hoped that, once he reached the colleague’s place, he would feel better, but that did not happen. Though the food looked delicious, he could not even have a spoonful of it. He had to apologize for not being able to stay there and he went straight back to his place. As soon as he reached home, he rushed to the bathroom and vomited. He lay in bed and tried to get rested, but he had to go back to the bathroom a couple of more times. His stomach was empty and he was just throwing up acidulous liquid. He tried to sleep but he could not. Hours passed, and when he realized, it was already 5:00 am. He had not had any sleep at all.
If he assumed that there were anything to learn from his life and if the higher power were to teach him a lesson, the lesson would be this; his life ought not exist and it should perhaps end right here right now. Because, in the end, there were nothing but desolations and catastrophes in his life. Why continue this forever and ever? But he, an atheist, asked himself, “Does the higher power exist?”
Short Stories (Fiction) | 23.11.2007 1:44 | No Comments
Letter From A Persevering Friend (Short Story No. 12)
I dedicate this story to Kotarou, the cutest and the most handsome dog in the world, and Fuku, the most beautiful and proudest female cat in the world, my two best friends …
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This story is somewhat autobiographical. So, several people who know me shall find that I created characters in the story based on them. I often write as if I wanted to convey certain messages and ideas to people I know, but it was not exactly the case when I wrote this particular story; I wrote this for myself and for the story. Thus, in case that you, my friends and acquaintances, feel that I am trying to say something to you, that is not exactly the case. Not in this story. I want to clarify that.
Chapter I. Diary, ‘Living Room’ - Letter From A Persevering Friend
Chapter II. What Happened Three Years Ago and What Is Happening Today - Letter From A Persevering Friend
Chapter III. Diary, ‘Money Is The Faith And The Conviction’ - Letter From A Persevering Friend
Chapter IV. Diary, ‘Headache’ - Letter From A Persevering Friend
Chapter V. Diary, ‘Debt’ - Letter From A Persevering Friend
Chapter VI. Conversation - Letter From A Persevering Friend
Chapter VII. Letter - Letter From A Persevering Friend
Short Stories (Fiction) | 22.11.2007 3:07 | No Comments
Chapter I. Diary, ‘Living Room’
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Just woke up an hour ago. 7:00 pm. It was getting dark outside when I got up. Completely dark outside now. Actually I woke up around noon today and had lunch. Shortly afterwards, I started working but I felt so sleepy; I could not stay awake. De facto, I did not want do; I felt the urge to sleep, so I went back to bed at around 2:00 pm. I was tired and not exactly motivated. I just wanted to take rest and pass the time while I reduced the amount of time of being sentient. Being awake meant feeling, and feeling meant pain and agony; I did not want that. When I got up, it was already 6:00 pm. In other words, I spent much of the day sleeping. Today is Sunday; I started spending Sundays like this lately. Sleep, get rested, and do not much else. See, the thing is that I accumulate a lot of stress during the week; that stress sucks out my energy. And as the week progresses, I become more and more tired both physically and mentally. I have to get a long deep sleep at least once a week in order to regain my energy. I tried a few things to mitigate accumulating nervous tension, but my life did not improve fundamentally. When I am awake, I feel and when I feel, I feel apprehension, animosity, agitation and aggravation. Long sleep on Sunday has become a necessary utility for me to keep going.
After I woke up for the second time today, I came downstairs and entered the kitchen. I turned on one of lights. I did not like how florescent lamps lighted up the room, so I just turned on an incandescent light bulb. My parents had not come home yet. My sister was out also. I opened the cabinet, took out a glass; then, I walked to the fridge, opened it and took out a can of beer. I sat on a sofa in the living attached to the dining area, served myself beer and had a small gulp. As I expected, my dog came to sit next to me; the dog, Kota, wanted me to pet him. So, I petted him and drank beer. I was not rushing; I was drinking like I wanted that cold liquid to sink in. Shortly after two of us started losing the sense of sorrow and loneliness, my cat appeared from nowhere. Funny, she looked like a loner, but whenever Kota and I sat together while no one else was in the house, the cat, Fuku, came to me as if she felt jealous. Afterwards, I opened another can. This was one of few moments that I felt peace, serenity and solitude.
And it passed 7:00 pm. I am putting my pen down and finishing beer.
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The young-adult man read what he wrote three years ago. It just occurred to him that he needed to go back and recall what he was going through then. He was going through a time of infirmity now. Stress, affliction, anguish, aggravation, frustration and despair. About three years ago, he was in a very resembling situation, and he looked to see if he could find a clue as to what he could do to find a way to get through the predicament. But the first diary entry he read was ‘Living Room’, in which he wrote about the moment of peace, serenity and solitude. He needed to find inner harmony now and it felt that reading this diary entry guided him how. He did not plan to go through all diary entries, but he wanted to read a few more.
Short Stories (Fiction) | 22.11.2007 3:02 | 1 Comment